As years go by, I am always amazed at how technology makes our lives easier. In the mid 90’s, the Internet was a pipe dream – but now we can’t live without it, and many of us use our cell phones to go online.  It’s a far cry from my first car phone.  I bought it for emergency use only, and it was the size of my shoe.

Recently in my own home, where technology is lagging a bit, we found it necessary to get a DVR.  Needless to say, I was getting tired of watching the Mickey Mouse Club House, The Wiggles, Batman, and Sesame Street. Okay, I actually like Batman, but couldn’t let my boys dominate the TV.

I was looking forward to watching Scrubs, The Office, and Alf at my leisure.  But my wife controls the DVR in the bedroom, so I’ve been stuck watching Oprah, Suze Orman, Keeping Up with the Kardashians, and The Bachelor/Bachelorette shows.  That aside, I can’t believe the Bachelorette picked the snowboarder!  Are you kidding me?  I was shocked.

Unbelievable!  What’s most upsetting is that I actually cared.  I’m busted, I watched it, and I got into it. I was looking forward to watching old favorites like Stripes, Animal House, and The Godfather, and instead I’m stuck wondering why DeAnna Pappas dumped Graham!

Okay, now to real issues, such as the recent actions of the Federal Reserve.  The initial purpose of the Fed was to maintain a balanced money supply to stabilize the economy and keep inflation in check. The Fed, with what appears to be the backing of the masses, is set to bail out every institution who’s made bad decisions – all at the expense of the taxpayer.  In other words, Big Brother is going to save us from ourselves.  The last time this happened was in the late 1970’s, when interest rates and inflation were in double digits.

The knee jerk reaction is to correct a wrong immediately.  To use my new favorite show as a metaphor, let’s get The Bachelorette to choose again and make sure she does it right this time.  Congress and the Fed are now proposing more oversight into the mortgage/housing market to protect us.  What they fail to realize is that the market has already made the changes, no longer offering the risky products that created the current problems.

The Fed is not fixing the problem; they’re simply throwing money at the problem in hopes of sustaining the institutions that are in trouble and averting a crisis.  In other words, these banks and institutions are getting a Do-Over.

Yes.  A Do-Over. A Do-Over happens when you don’t succeed the first time, and then pretend your first effort didn’t count.  I can vividly remember instituting the Do-Over rule as a child, when the following were legitimate reasons for Do-Overs:

Playing golf and wanting to keep your score under 100 (I was a great golfer back then).

Being the first one out in Dodge Ball in 3rd grade; blindsided by Lisa Steimer. Definite Do-Over.  (This is just an example, it didn’t necessarily happen…).

Taking a Do-Over in Monopoly when playing your younger sister, after just missing a landing on Boardwalk and Park Place.

Playing H-O-R-S-E and missing the last shot because someone screamed to distract you.

And as time moves on, Do-Overs just fade away:

1. That lay up I missed sophomore year cost us the Sectional win, resulting in our Varsity coach losing his job.
No Do-Over.

2. Cubs v. Marlins in the 2003 NLCS. Steve Bartman gets in the way of a foul ball leading to the Cubs losing the game, series, and century – further extending their drought.
No Do-Over.

3. The 2005 Chicago White Sox, game four of the World Series…Oops, never mind, they actually won the World Series.

Today’s market is incredibly efficient, yet the government feels the need to step in with taxpayer funds.  But prolonging this issue with a weaker dollar, inflationary pressure, and higher taxes is much worse.

The Fed is decreasing the value of the dollar by pumping money into the economy in the form of useless rate cuts, causing higher gas prices and inflation.  If taking some action simply for the sake of doing something regardless of the result is what is needed, then there’s no benefit.  It may be political suicide to do nothing and let the market correct itself, yet that’s exactly what has happened over the past few months.  Sub-prime lending is all but gone.  Stated Income and No Income Verification loans are scrutinized and very rare.

After careful consideration and countless hours watching bad TV, here’s a list of the worst five spin offs of all time:

5. Three’s a Crowd
Are you kidding me? After all those years John Ritter never hooks up with his roommates, but gets married, and I’m supposed to watch that?

4. Laverne & Shirley
The move to LA was the last straw.  It wasn’t funny when they tripped over everything in the Milwaukee setting, and got even worse in LA.

3. Joey from Friends
It’s as if NBC didn’t care what this show did.  They just hoped that the people who didn’t want Friends to end would tune in.
2. Joanie Loves Chachi
Happy Days is now 0 for 2. One of the most painful shows to watch, especially when their music careers took off and they were singing in front of 4 people in the show.

1. Enos from Dukes of Hazard
As a young adolescent, I can’t begin to describe my disappointment in the cancellation of Daisy Duke – and her replacement with this forgettable accident.  I expected an apology from CBS.

I understand that stating such opinions based on taste may cause controversy.  Please feel free to call me at 773.413.6256 or email dean@perlmortgage.com with your list of Top 5 worst spin offs.  I’ll list them in the next newsletter.